세월

나이가 드나.

지난 시간들이 눈을 뜨나 감으나 단막극처럼 흐른다.

첨삭 자문을 하며 왜그랬을까 되묻는다.

아들이 알려주는 논리가 정돈된 지난 이야기를 시리즈로 들으며 웃고 또 흐느끼며 웃는다.

지난 시간들은 몇권의 책으로 남아 꺼내 읽고를 반복하며 나를 떠올린다.

후회하지 않은 시간 이었다고 생각했는데 착각 이었을까?

결국 스스로를 다스리지 못한 방황의 시간이었음을 깨알같이 적힌 찰나노트를 바라보며 깨닫는다.

나이가 든다는건 약해지는것이 아니라 생의 본질로 더욱 깊어져 힘빼고 살아도 된다는걸 몸으로 실천하며 사는 것이다.

시간이 쉼없이 흐르고 버퍼링 오류로 반복된 시간에 갇힌다해도 조금더 여유가 생길것 같다.

살아있음 자체로 너무나 소중하고 사랑스러우니까.

[kboard_comments]

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